Staff Cook-Off

My school is big into bonding type activities among the staff. Which I quite like, especially when some competitiveness gets mixed in with the bonding- BONUS!

Example: Staff Cook-Off

There were three categories in which to compete:
1. Soup
2. Chili
3. Dessert
(anyone who didn't want to/couldn't cook was instructed to bring 'extras' aka chips, cheese, dip etc)

I'm usually in the 'extras' category at these types of events. I'm not gifted with being able to follow a recipe... all the different 'spoon' measuring references throw me off (table, tea... 1/2 a teaspoon, bleeh) and I get very frustrated when my end result looks nothing like the picture in the recipe book.

But I wanted to make a good impression. I'm basically on a 6 week interview with this long subbing job. Nobody wants to hire the teacher who just drops off a bag of Fritos. Not that there's anything wrong with Fritos; they're salty and curved slightly for maximum dip-holding... just nobody wants Fritos to run a classroom.

My mother happens to be an excellent cook. And she wants me to succeed of course. So she made my favorite soup for me.

To be fair, she was going to be making it anyway, all she had to do was double the batch so I could take some to the cook-off. I was also very careful not to lie at the actual cook-off. I never talked about me making it. I did totally rant about the yummy-ness of kale (a type of cabbage which is DELICIOUS and super good for you and everyone should go get some) in the soup so much that one teacher sitting at the table mused "I've never heard the word 'kale' so much in my life as I have in the last ten minutes." I'm going to go ahead and take that as a compliment.

The name of the soup is Zuppa Tuscana, and it has kale (yum yum), potato and potato skins, sausage, red pepper, onions, garlic, chicken broth, bacon and spices in it. You may have had it at Olive Garden haha. It was big hit at the cook-off. Lunches at my school start in 3rd period and run all the way through 6th. 3rd is my lunch period, so there wasn't much action yet obviously. 6th period is my conference period, so I went back to the teacher's lounge and this is what I found.

My soup had been dominated! Scraped all the way gone. I did notice that though the crock pot was clearly empty, no one thought to switch the heat off and so the remnants got crusted to the bottom. I then was that person who went around and switched all the heats off on the empty pots. Anyway, YAY my soup was all eaten! No better compliment than that. There were some chilis that sadly were still half full.

There were big poster boards in the lounge for people to vote for their favorite soups, chilis and deserts. You can only vote once in each category. I voted for myself for the soup (duh), chili I voted for my friend who asked me too (I'm not a big chili fan... I fear spicy so my vote was totally up for grabs to whoever asked first) and with dessert I voted for a friend's cake, but I was totally in love with these cream cheese oreo balls dipped in almond bark. Don't worry, the oreo balls won by a landslide, as they should have, they were like dessert crack.

As anyone who is on any level a close friend with me knows, I'm a bit of a cheater. Apples to Apples? If I'm playing in a big enough group, I definitely put in more than one red card to boost my odds. Scrabble? I google possible words on my phone under the table. Spades? Me and my partner have been known to peek at the other team's cards when they go to the bathroom.
But I would like to honestly say, I didn't cheat in any manner with the voting. I only voted ONCE for myself in the soup category. And that's what made the end result so ridiculous.

At the end of the day, an e-mail went out with the winners. The Soup Winner: Chicken Fajita.

What!?

First off, chicken fajita is not a soup, it's fajitas! Those go on a grill and get wrapped in tortillas. Not liquefied and simmered in a crock pot to win a cook off.

Oh well. Fair is fair, right?

Till I went down to the lounge after the final bell and saw the tallies.

I know it's a little (ok a lot) difficult to read. But in the middle you can make out my "Zuppa Tuscana" and then second from the bottom nicely circled is the winner, "Chicken Fajita."

Now, let me go ahead and tell you the tally results, since the bright pink poster board is assaulting your eyes.

Zuppa Tuscana: 16
Chicken Fajita: 17

ONE POINT! Ahhhhhh

If I had just smoozed some, talked a few people up for their votes- maybe I would have fared better. Or perhaps the chicken fajita entree was just one point more yummy than mine. At least I had 16 fans!

Or rather my mother did haha, congrats to her!

Teacher Props

Today I missed my glasses a little bit.

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love, love, love my new eyes. LASIK was one of the best things I’ve ever done. (Here’s the link to my surgery if you’re curious ---> http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=10150130195486753&comments)

But my glasses were my “teacher prop.”

A teacher prop is something I’ve discovered that all teachers have, whether they know it or not.

We teachers have to stand in front of kids. A lot. Basically all day long. Part of the requirements to be a teacher (at least a successful one who manages to get anything done) is that you be comfortable in front of an audience. And middle schoolers are not just “any” audience. They are often grumpy, bored, disinterested, annoying, distracted or flat-out angry. That isn’t a put-down on my students, it is a fact. Sometimes the audience teachers have to teach in front of is less than totally receptive.

All types of audience issues can be dealt with through classroom management and lots of patience. But while the classroom management plans are being executed, or while day-to-day business is being conducted, a teacher has a teacher prop.

Establishing an authoritative presence doesn’t come easily or quickly. If you act like you’re nervous or unsure in front of the students, they will see the weakness and you’ll have a heck of a time getting them to do anything you want. I think teachers subconsciously use a teacher prop to help them stay focused and confident. Using something to “prop themselves up” to stay in front of the audience.

I’ve seen lots of different teacher props.

Papers: These can be worksheets, attendance sheets, hand-outs, a lesson outline… anything on white standard paper. The number of papers can vary, as many as a stack for a whole class, or a single sheet. This prop has several different applications of use- reshuffling on a podium, desk or cart, held in the hands and tapped with fingers, or clasped against the chest. Holding papers conveys the message that ‘I am a teacher, look at all this work I have for you/myself.’ The paper prop can also be a silent authoritative threat… the class is supposed to be working on an assignment (when this threat is applied, the current assignment could typically be considered ‘fun’) but in case the class gets out of hand, the teacher walks around the room monitoring progress while holding a stack of ‘un-fun’ worksheets that could be given at any moment to a disruptive student. Management via a prop without verbal cues.

Writing Utensil (pen/pencil/dry erase marker): This is an extremely versatile prop. It is able to be kept in hand throughout an entire class period because often a writing utensil is be used during instruction. In down time, a writing utensil can be used for tapping, bouncing between fingers, twirling down by one’s side or rolling between palms- perfect outlets for energy. One of my favorite activities was clicking the cap of an Expo marker half-off, then clicking it back on. I could do that a hundred times while giving a powerpoint presentation. The teacher’s pen is also powerful, able to scrawl anything across student work and have it contain meaning. Pens are also what document grades atop assignments. All students care about grades, whether they will admit it or not. Writing utensils are the most applicable prop.

Hands: Every single teacher has used this prop at some point, because they’re right at the ends of your arms and you just can’t help it. I find great comfort in putting my hands behind my back when I’m lecturing and absentmindedly picking at my fingernails. (I tend to pick at my nails all the time, much to my mother’s dismay) Other hand prop activities can be popping knuckles, tapping fingers or rubbing your hands together. Of all the props, I think this one could most easily backfire and appear as if you are unsure of yourself.

ID/Lanyard: Since I don’t have glasses anymore, this is the prop I’ve used the most. At my school, all students and staff are required to wear ID badges. These badges have the obligatory pixilated poor quality identification photo and hang around everyone’s necks by a basic lanyard in our school’s main color. The ID/lanyard provides a simple outlet for any nervous energy, aka fidgeting. The ID hangs by my waist so it’s easy to just hold onto while I talk, or I can mess with the keys I’ve clipped there for safekeeping. I have to be careful not to go overboard though, or fidgeting with my ID translates nervousness, rather than ‘I’m casual with issuing instructions, I’m just hanging out at the front of the room.’

I loved my glasses. They were in constant use on my face because I feel like they made me look smart. Otherwise I could adjust them delicately with one finger on the side while speaking, or stare sternly over the rims at a student who was being disruptive. I could also take them off and clean them with the edge of my cardigan and then put them back on dramatically if I was trying to make a point. Without my glasses, my face feels sort of naked. I still catch myself trying to adjust glasses that are no longer there.

I don’t think my quality of teaching has suffered because of my lack of lens wear, that would be ridiculous. It’s just that having glasses was a part of my persona as a teacher and now I’m on my way to adjusting to teaching without that prop.

I do still have my glasses at home in a drawer. I should put nonprescription lens in them and pretend sometime.

82 Degrees

Today was the end of my first week long term subbing. (Technically my week was 4 days since I started on Tuesday but oh well).

Yesterday was a fairly difficult day for me due to some miscommunications... But I'm almost glad it happened because it showed me how awesome my co-workers are.

I didn't sleep much last night because I keep replaying the day over and over in my head; you know those times when your brain won't just shut off. I think I dozed for about 4 hours.

In the morning one of my wonderful co-workers brought me a hot chai tea from starbucks. It was the most perfect thing I didn't even know I needed that morning. My eyes were burning when I blinked and my head was equal parts foggy and still lucidly spinning over previous events. The tea was warm and I just stood in one place and sipped it for a good three minutes. I carried that cup of perfection to the copy room, the library... all my morning errands around the school. It cleared my mind and woke me up.

The rest of the day was just as warm as that tea.

Because my room's AC went on the fritz!!

Let me back up and put my day in context.

Every Friday my school shaves 5 minutes off every class period and has a tutoring session to prepare students for state testing. The result is the whole class period order gets a bit shuffled. The kids do not react well to getting jostled out of their routine.

Add that to it being Friday, not only just Friday but the first Friday after a full week without a Snow Day reprieve in 3 weeks. They're already going stir-crazy.

Meanwhile...

My room had been steadily increasing in temperature all day. It started at 7:45am at a normal "empty" 72. I say empty because once a classroom is full of adolescents, the temp shoots up a minimum of 3-5 degrees from I don't know, something like, puberty heat.

10am: 75

Noon: 77

2pm: 79

By 3pm and at the start of my last class of the day my room is registering 82 degrees.

The air is not moving. It's like breathing soup. There was seriously a 10 degree difference between the hallway and the entrance to my room.

Once my some 20-odd Speech students piled into the room the environment became straight up unbearable.

My students are supposed to be working on a testimony/eulogy about a person in their life they cared about. My classroom was so sweltering, the kids were antsy, I just couldn't take it.

Me: "OK! Everyone up! We're going outside!"

I was immediately faced with a bunch of blank stares. My own mind was whirling, hoping that it was indeed okay that I take my band of sweaty students outside out of the sauna.

We went out a side door into a sloped area in the shade of the school. (There are a lot of s's in that sentence...) We sat in a loose circle and went around one by one doing the exercise we would have completed sitting in desks.

The kids got very deep and emotional when talking about a person that meant a lot to them. Anytime that I let myself forget the kinds of lives a lot of these kids have, they remind me in the most profound ways. These 12/13 years old sat in that grassy circle and talked about choosing sides after a divorce (sometimes divorceS), calling 911 in a parking lot while a family member had a heart attack, losing a sibling to death too soon and feeling judged at 12 years old for their "lifestyle choices."

After about 40 minutes we went inside (there was a moment when we realized the side door had locked behind us and I thought I was going to have to traipse through the school's front lobby with my entire class. Then someone opened the door) and the bell rang ending that long Friday and thus the week closed out for me rather quietly.

The Speech classes will be working on these personal speeches for the next week and a half. I'm both concerned and (kind of interestingly) anticipating hearing the completed speeches.

The more time I spend teaching, the more I actually learn from the students.

And I really hope my AC is fixed by Monday.

My Own Desk (someday)

I decided to change the title thingy of my blog. Because technically... it's not "both sides of the desk" anymore since I have ceased to be a student. At least I ceased in the best possible way aka graduating.

My web address will still be bothsidesofthedesk.blogspot.com because I'm fairly certain that can't be changed. Maybe when/if I go back to school for a masters program (which right now the idea of that makes me want to cry really loud like a toddler) the title can go back to the 'both sides.'

For now I'm going with this catchy little zinger "Not My Own Desk Yet" because... it's true. I'm a substitute, and even though I'm in the best long-term sub job basically EVER- I'm still a substitute. It's still someone else's desk. Which I am totally okay with, I'm beyond blessed to be in my current position. I appreciate this job more than I can say. I'm just changing the title to match the facts. My current status must be reflected in my blog title, duh.

One day I will have my own desk, and that day will be great :)

Someone had a baby, I get to have a job!

I knew THE phone call would be coming sooner rather than later… my teacher I was long term subbing for was now a full 9 months pregnant and I knew any moment I could get the call that I had to go into work.

I kept my phone with me all day Monday. I didn’t get called for any other job, so I just hung out at home. And by that I mean I laid on the couch and watched my DVR-ed Grammy’s with my phone right next to me.

About 3-ish I felt like all my blood was going flat on one side of my body from being horizontal so long so I decided to do something really adventurous… like go get the mail.

I left my phone inside and went and got the mail. I get back inside.

Missed call from my school.

Thank yoooooou.
I was gone a whole two minutes after I didn’t move from next to my phone for 5 hours. And I miss the call.

No matter. I call back, and YAY as of Tuesday, I’m a long term sub. Report in for duty at 8am.

It’s not till after I hang up the phone that I’m hit with the full knowledge that I’m going to be responsible for three separate classes: yearbook, media and speech. Deep breaths. Not too many… that’ll make you hyperventilate and nobody looks professional heaving into a paper bag.

I was worried I was going to get to school late because I have the cruel luck of being late to every important “first.”

I'm my parent's firstborn but I was born a day late, much to the dismay of my mother who spent the time counting contractions in Home Depot while my father shopped.
I was the very last one of my friends to get boobs in high school. Girls track that sort of thing quite closely. I didn't "woman" myself until the sweet awkward age of like 16 and 1/2.
I woke up 10 minutes before my Ancient Near East 4250 final exam my sophomore year of college.
My alarm didn’t go off my very, very first day of student teaching and I arrived at the school at 10:30 instead of 7:30.
I woke up at 7:45am, the day I was actually supposed to meet my student teaching mentor for my second semester…. at 8:00am.

So anyway, I wanted to avoid that panicked, heart-in-your-throat-this-is-a-terrible-first-impression-I-wonder-if-I-brushed-my-teeth moment on my first day of my long term job(aka a 6 week interview at the school I would love to get hired at).

I left my house with an hour available to make the 23 mile trek. It took me approximately an hour and ten minutes. Just enough to make me late and not enjoy my walk in from the parking lot.

I get inside the school and run into one of the women from administration, who informs me that all the teachers are in a staff meeting in the library and I should just go on in. This makes me a little nervous, but I’m thinking I can just sidle in on the side and stand by the book return in a safe no-notice-me zone.

False.

I walk in and take up a position on the side. Where no one can really see me. In fact, I'm pretty sure I was halfway behind a pillar.

And within minutes, the principal is gesturing the universal ‘come here’ wave with her hand.

At me.

In front of every teacher in the school.

So I walk in a little, as the principal announces who I am, and that I’m here while Mrs. Such-n-Such (not her real name haha) is having her baby. She then proceeds to say that she has seen the great ideas I have given Mrs. Such-n-Such and she thinks I’ll do a great job.
I do the world’s most awkward little half wave to all the full-time employed people eyeballing me, the sub with apparently “great ideas.” *gulp* No pressure here.

I am flattered though. I’d passed along the idea that the yearbook students could work on a blog for the school after the yearbook is completed next week. The principal sent me an e-mail in the morning with a green light to go ahead. I used my lunch break to draft up a blog site and sent it to her. Her verdict: “Looks good. Do it.”

I was excited. The day was a little bit of a struggle as I worked to get my feet under me. Managing 3 very different classes within one schedule was just as much of a challenge as I thought. I did have some very helpful teachers in my hall that were lovely support.

I did have some tech issues, and Mrs. Such-n-Such called me from the hospital and after happily declaring that “the baby should be here in about two hours, but I’m on some really good drugs” proceeded to walk me through her website and fixed the problem I’d been wrestling with for two hours in two minutes.

The most humorous thing happened in my last class of the day. It was a Speech class. The students have a blank outline for a generic speech, and they are to come up with a topic of their choosing and back it up with details.
The following went pretty much like this:

(This is between me, and a male student with thick foreign accent. I’ll call him… Norberto. Forgive me as I try and capture Norberto's accent in written form)

Norberto: I don’t nah wut to write aboot.
Me: Anything that you want. What’s an issue that is important to you?

*pause*

Norberto: Pandah burrs smokenn cigarettes.

*pause*

Me: What?
Norberto: Pandah burrs smokenn cigarettes.
Me: Um. Ok. Uh, you care about panda bears?
Norberto: No. Well, I sarw ahh Asian smokenn once, and dahh’s like the same theng.

*pause*

Me: Are you serious?
Norberto: Yuss.

At that point I truly did not know what to say… so it was very lucky that at that moment another student called for my attention. I didn’t go back over near Norberto for the remainder of the class. I genuinely didn’t know what to say! He has a difficult face to read; add that on top of the accent and I was looking at a closed book… in Greek or something. Definitely a language I don’t know.

Good thing I get to spend the end of every day with him, figuring out if he really thinks Asians are panda bears.

Overall I’m very excited about these coming 6 weeks. I enjoy having my days full. And of course I get lots of stories to tell. It is kind of comforting to be back in the school I student taught at.

Mostly I was just happy that in my 1 ½ minute time slot to pee between classes I already knew where all the bathrooms are.

Deja Vu

It's a Wednesday, and we're having yet another Snow Day. In the last two weeks, we've had 5 snow/ice days off.

At midnight last night, I sat in my room and listened to the howling wind. (I decided that wind is pretty scary. You can't see it, you can't control it and it does a lot of damage. Invisible danger!) I checked the weather on my phone:
100% chance of snow
High of 27, Low of 10
And yet at midnight, my school district had yet to post that they were closed.

I went to bed with my phone right beside me (like always) but I was not expecting a sub call.

And sure enough, I awoke to a world of white. And a whole heck of a lot of wind. The snow was so powdery that the wind was whipping it up around and all over the place. It was impossible to tell if the snow was falling up, down or whatever. Another winter wonderland. Yay.

I haven't subbed in like two weeks, but I'm trying not to get discouraged.

My long-term sub job is still on the books as far as I know. My friend is definitely having her baby on the 14th; if it won't come on it's own, she's getting induced. (Way to show that baby whose the boss) And don't judge me for calling the baby an "it", that's not my fault. The parents have elected to not find out the sex. So to avoid saying 'the baby, the baby' over and over, I have to resort to the pronoun of 'it.' I hope 'it' is a pronoun or else I just made myself sound pretty dumb...

Tomorrow we're supposed to get some sunshine and above freezing temperatures, so here's fingers crossed for global warming to kick into gear.

Brrrrr!

Whoever said that global warming is an impending threat on humanity can go stand out in my frozen driveway and turn into a permanent icicle.

I'm currently fighting off the cabin fever of two back-to-back snow days. Or should I say "ice days" as in at least an inch of powdery frozen death covering every surface. And hooray- we get another Ice Day tomorrow.

So the week went:

Monday- no sub call. I stay home.

Tuesday through Thursday- Ice Days

Friday- maybe work?

Oh bother. Snow days are only fun if you can still do everything you want, like a bonus Saturday in the middle of the week.

However.

These Ice Days have not been bonus Saturdays. We have had joys such as:

- power outages (resulting in the satellite having to reset itself every 20 minutes which means *gasp* nothing records)

- I don't know if this is a normal side effect of power surges/outages but the smoke detectors beep in very loud protest which in turn causes Chester to freak out. Seriously, I don't think Chester stopped pacing and whining for a good hour.

- the roads are frozen, encased under a layer of hardcore ice. Usually on snow days the snows gone by noon-ish and you can go shopping or over to people's houses. No. We are stuck.

- we have intense winds during the night, which shoved the huge new grill off the patio.

Funny thing about the grill. My Mom and I discovered it laying on it's side like a wounded animal. Our patio is elevated about two and a half feet at the point where the grill made it's fall. Luckily it was resting against a sturdy tree right next to the patio, but the gas line connecting the grill to the house seemed stretched rather taut.

I don't know what happens when a gas line gets ripped out, but I don't want to find out. So my mother (fresh out of the shower and in my dad's workboots and sweats) and me (in a hoodie and Ugg slippers) have to get this grill back on the patio.

This grill is not small. It's a big hulking silver beast designed to flame meat into tasty submission. And the beast is not going anywhere easily. It takes Mom standing behind it and me tugging at the top and using the edge of the patio as a fulcrum (how smart are we!?) to tilt the grill back relatively into place without blowing up.

It wasn't until we went back inside that we discovered the funniest fact about our little adventure. Mom's wet hair was no longer wet; it was frozen. Literally, I'm not exaggerating, her tendrils of hair were now brunette icicles.

All in all I can say with total honesty: I'd rather be teaching little gangsters than hauling frozen outdoor cooking equipment around.